Talk Yourself In, But Have a Way Out

I would have missed so many beautiful moments like this if I had talked myself out of running

I have a very solid exercise habit. Six days a week, after I have done my writing, I head out for a run or go to the gym. It’s a routine that I enjoy and one that I have stuck with for years.

Some mornings, though not very often anymore, I have a little discussion with myself. I am feeling lazy, or it’s windy out, and I try to talk myself out of going. I don’t know who this self-sabotaging person is, but I don’t like her.

I’ve learned an easy way to motivate myself when the little voice is trying to stop me. I give myself a way out.

If I start running and it is too windy, I tell myself I can always stop and come back home. Or, if I go to the gym and it’s too busy or I don’t feel like doing much, I can always leave.

The out gets me in. And once I am in, I almost never want out.

Starting is the secret. This applies to any project that you need to do, any tasks you have to perform or phone calls that you need to make. Get started and give yourself an exit plan.

Promise yourself that after you do something for 15 minutes, then you can watch videos or check your Instagram or send a text to a friend. Delayed gratification and the promise of something good to come can be enough incentive to get the ball rolling.

Once you begin, very often you will find that momentum builds and you are able to do much more than what you had promised yourself. Like an unstoppable force, you move towards the finish line with a sense of accomplishment and ease.

These little successes add up and contribute to the development of you on a much larger scale.

Tasks that are completed provide incentive to begin new ones. We feel good about ourselves when we get stuff done.

Having an escape plan makes everything flow much more easily.

I’ve often wondered if this tactic would work in relationships. It’s something to think about. If you knew that a relationship had a predetermined expiration date, say of a year, would it change the quality of the interactions? It feels as though everything would be appreciated so much more.

Not very practical if you want a family, but maybe a way to enhance the appreciation for what you have.

Talking yourself into trying new things is better than talking yourself out of it. Until you do something, you don’t know if you will like it or not. The same goes with different types of food, or entertainment, or relationships with people.

Judging an experience before you even try it is a limiting way to live. Life should never cease to inspire and amaze you as you discover new things along the way.

But have the escape plan. Always have the ability to get out of something if you want to.

It’s a good strategy in life. When we get on an airplane, we are told where the escape exits are. We usually don’t pay attention, but if it was ever necessary it would really be nice to be able to find the way out.

When you go out in public, to a restaurant or the theatre, it doesn’t hurt to look around and be aware of which way to go if you need to get out quickly. This isn’t paranoia, just practicality. It’s always important to know your options in advance.

Decide what you want to do, and then before you talk yourself out of it find the escape clause. Make bargains with yourself and you will be amazed at what you will accomplish along the way.

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