Taking time to think about what I want is good; putting off what I need to do really isn’t
I just want to feel good.
Whatever I do, this is the ultimate goal. Whatever I think I need in my life, the ultimate aim is to feel good.
It could be a job, a partner, some kind of food or a glass of wine. At the root of everything I do is the desire to feel good.
So why do some of the things I choose to do not support that ultimate goal?
I have been involved with people I knew would be no good for me. I have had more to drink or eat than I should, at some level knowing that I was going to pay for it but unwilling in the moment to stop.
I eat things sometimes because they taste so good, and then my body fights back and nothing about it is good anymore.
It seems kind of insane to do this knowing that it won’t lead me back to what I want, which is to feel good.
At least there wasn’t whipped cream on it! Photo Credit: MrWillWong.com
It’s like having a split personality really.
Every day I wake up, sometimes full of energy and sometimes not as much. My thoughts quickly flow back to what I accomplished or didn’t get done the day before.
And I remember all of the things I did that I said I wasn’t going to do anymore.
Everything seems so much easier first thing in the morning. I wake up full of resolve, ready to get things done, eat healthy foods, be proactive and responsible and completely focused on what I need to do.
Then sometime in the afternoon, I find myself not quite as enthusiastic as when I first set out that day.
In the morning we feel ready to conquer the world. We know who we want to be, what we want to do, and what we need to do better.
Some path, somewhere in Costa Rica. Leading where? I have no idea…
I often marvel at how a single moment in time can change the course of a life completely.
It could be an accident, a phone call, a chance meeting with someone, or finally saying out loud to someone what you have wanted to say.
That’s how powerful each moment can be.
I remember lots of moments like this in my life. Like telling someone I had been with for years that I was leaving, building up the courage to say out loud what I had rehearsed so many times until it was finally screaming inside of my mind so loud that the words had to come out.
Of course the words didn’t come out the way I wanted them to. All of the rehearsal was a waste of time, because nothing went according to script.
Look before you leap, or just leap? This handsome guy I met in Costa Rica says just go…
I did something interesting yesterday. I looked back at the trail of decisions that have led me to where I am in this moment.
Some of them were big ones, like moving across the country and leaving friends and family behind. Others weren’t as spectacular, like what I had for breakfast yesterday.
The thing that struck me most was that in every moment, we make decisions that determine what our future will look like.
There is so much power in this that it’s almost paralyzing. If you had to consciously think through every moment of life, would that empower you or stop you in your tracks?
That’s where habits come in, and to some degree they are very useful. For instance, I don’t want to think about getting ready every morning to start my day. Things like brushing my teeth, getting dressed, and having breakfast are routine activities that I don’t want to fuss over constantly.
Can I get a crystal ball before I make a decision? That wouldn’t be any fun though!
Good, bad, or ugly, we make them every day. Constantly. Actually, in every moment.
Most of our time is spent making the same decisions we always make. Decisions made over a period of time become habits, and these habits become so ingrained that they are difficult to change.
If your habits aren’t taking you where you want to go, it’s time to make a decision to change them!
The most liberating thought is knowing that you can change everything about your life and even who you are by making the decision to do so. Quite honestly, you can reinvent yourself completely in the span of 10 seconds.
Just do it becomes just decide it.
Hate your job? Then figure out how to change it. If you can’t find aspects of it to improve and enjoy, then it might be time to leave. Complaining about it doesn’t make anything better.
Make a decision one way or the other, and then take action. Once you set the wheels in motion you can change your work situation completely.
Hate your relationship? Before you change it, look at yourself first. Expecting another person to make you happy is unfair. If you are unhappy with yourself, it doesn’t matter what happens outside of you. You will still be unhappy. Work on yourself first and see if that changes the relationship too. If not, then you can make a decision about it then.
Hate your body? This one is the easiest because you can take steps right now to improve it. Change how you eat and exercise and decide in every moment that you want to be the best physical self you can be.
This all sounds so easy, and in reality it is. With each decision made in every moment, you are either moving towards something you want or away from it. The power is yours to do whatever you want.
Fear is the biggest impediment to initiating changes. We become comfortable with routines and with the illusion of security and safety, and inertia sets in. Change can be difficult, but the thought of being exactly where you are or even worse off five years from now should be a great motivator.
Without taking action and moving towards something, you are resigning yourself to staying stuck. That should cause more fear than the thought of change does.
Consider that all of us are here for a limited time. The realization of our own mortality can be the biggest motivator there is. If you don’t take action now, then when?
It isn’t about what we are doing, but the love and joy that we bring to each task that matters. Make the decision to be a peaceful, joyful entity and you can become that. Learn to step outside of the reactions you normally have and respond in a different way.
Make the decision to be who you want to be and then just do it!
