Do you ever take the time to be proud of yourself?
Do you ever say, “ I am doing my best and that is enough right now, and I am enough” and actually mean it?
The proliferation of self-help books and courses and seminars makes me wonder if any of us think that we are doing okay without needing to be changed into someone else.
We all possess a need to be creative. We like to fix, tinker, and adjust things with the idea that they can always be better, and in ourselves we aspire to be more than who we are.
We want to do better. Our bodies should look fitter, we should read more, be more intelligent, make better decisions and have more money.
It can get to a point though when we want to be anything other than what we are, and we resent the fact that we aren’t who we think should be. It can be a challenge to accept ourselves but to strive to grow at the same time.
That is why the self-help market is so big right now. Once we believe that we aren’t enough, we begin to look for help to be more of what we think we aren’t.
We hope that someone else can give us all the answers to why we aren’t perfect and how to fix it.
It’s all about acceptance and denial. There is a big difference between the two.
We can accept where we are and who we have become right now, and if it isn’t exactly what we want then we have the power through choice to begin to move in a new direction. Accepting who you are is different from wanting to change your life situation.
Denial is weak. It takes away your power to do anything. It usually involves blaming someone or something else for any shortcomings in your life, without inspiring you to take action to do anything about it.
We start to point the finger at others. If only he were different then I could be who I want. If my parents had done this then I could be that.
None of this matters now. It may all be very true, but giving away your power to stories or to things over which you have no control completely limits what you are able to do about it.
If you are in a situation where you are being emotionally or physically abused, then you need to change it or get out. Find a way. Respect yourself enough to know that there has to be an option and then find it.
If you are needing someone else to change before you can be happy, begin to understand how insane this is. It is not for you to decide how someone else should act or feel. That is none of your business.
Release them from your need to control them and realize that the unhappiness you feel is within you, not coming from outside.
The power lies within. It can never be anywhere else.
By looking for the answer outside of yourself, you have conceded defeat. No one has the answer for you but you.
There is no book you will read, no speaker you will hear, and no amount of changing that someone else can do to fix how you feel inside.
Inspiration from an outside source may stir something within you to take back your power, but until you are ready to do that nothing will get through to you.
People have breakthroughs all the time, and whatever book they are reading or person they are listening to at the time will get the credit.
The credit should go to you. When you are ready to make a change, you will make it. When you are prepared to take back your power, you will be able to do so.
Until that moment, nothing that happens on the outside will have any influence over how you feel about yourself inside.