In the book The Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz manages to sum up the secret to living peacefully into four simple statements. Be impeccable with your word. Don’t take anything personally. Don’t make any assumptions. Always do your best.
It is the last one that I find the most intriguing.
First, is it even possible to always do your best? It is, if you understand that your best will look different all of the time.
Just because you were able to do something yesterday doesn’t mean that it will look the same today. We always think that we should get better and do more but sometimes that just isn’t possible.
Sometimes there are days when just coping with what is going on and not having a meltdown is as good as it gets. Doing your best in those moments will look much different than when everything is going your way and you feel like you are on top of the world.
Being present and aware are the keys to coming up with the most appropriate response to every possible situation.
So many things happen outside of our control. You can find yourself in situations that are unpleasant or even dangerous, and responding in that moment will look different depending on what is going on.
These big or dangerous moments are outside of the scope of daily routine life. For the most part we have an idea of what our days will look like, a routine that we can follow and an idea of what our expectations are. This is where doing your best can mean many different things.
It is important to be honest with yourself when you decide if you did your best or not. Blaming others for how you acted is giving away your power.
You can only give your best when you feel your best. If you don’t feel well, do what is within your control to help your body out. Only you know which behaviours you are participating in that either support you or cause unnecessary harm.
Denying the needs of the physical body will affect how your best will look. If you aren’t eating properly or resting enough, it won’t take long before your best efforts become affected by real physical concerns.
Beyond the physical, there is the mental state to consider. If you are living a life filled with stress and anxiety, then admitting that this is where you are and asking yourself if there are ways to alleviate the pressure is necessary.
Mental stress will cause physical symptoms, and then you will be unable to do much of anything. The things you think are important now will seem much less so if your body succumbs to a state of disease due to lifestyle issues.
For me, doing my best means making decisions every day to find peace and joy in my life. I exercise my body to keep it healthy and choose foods that support my goal to feel good.
I minimize any attachment to things or people that I think I need to feel happy. I understand that happiness is a state of being that doesn’t depend on having something external to me.
I am happy because I am happy. Nothing I acquire can make me that way because I already am happy.
The releasing of the need to get more or be more than I already am has been my single most important accomplishment. It has freed me to enjoy life as it flows and changes around me, as things and people come and go and as I grow older.
From this position of acceptance, I am able to always do my best and to be okay with how that looks at the moment. I have found peace in accepting myself and my life completely.