Why do we think that we don’t control who we choose to be? When someone does something and then is unhappy about it, they might say, “Oh, I just couldn’t help myself,” or “I don’t know why I always do that.”
If you aren’t in control of you, then who is?
Your thoughts, your emotions, the way you speak, act, and function in society is all a choice. Many choices actually, but all leading back to one thing: you put out into the world a projection of who you think you are.
No personality traits we have are set in stone. Who you think you are is an accumulation of experiences and the molding that has been done to you by outside influences. You have accepted these ideas and now you project that image to others.
Basically, you become what you think about all day long. Then through your words and actions, you tell everyone else who that is.
The premise of much of the self-help movement comes down to linguistics and physiology. Change the way you speak to yourself and others and you can change your experiences in life. Assume a certain way of carrying yourself and what you project out will be attracted back to you.
It’s simple, and it’s true. Seems too easy though, right? All that I need to do to change my entire life is to walk differently and use certain words when I speak and think?
You won’t know until you try it for yourself.
We make judgments about others all of the time. Most of the time they are somewhat accurate, but often they are unfair and false. It doesn’t matter though, what is important is that we do it constantly.
You are also being judged whether you like it or not.
Think right now of a person who is depressed. How do they look? What sorts of words do they use? When they speak, do they sound full of energy or something quite different?
Then imagine a successful person, someone who seems to have it all. What differences in physiology and in language do you see and hear?
Chances are, when you think of things in these extremes you become aware of the striking difference between these two personalities. Language, both verbal and nonverbal, is everything when it comes to how we move through life.
It all comes back to who you believe you are. When you tell others who you are by the way you act and talk, they will believe you. You will be treated accordingly.
The beauty of this is that none of it is real. Nothing needs to stay the way it was, not even for a moment. Right now you can completely change the message about yourself that you are broadcasting to the world.
If you were confident, how would that look? If you knew that you were good at what you do, that you have lots to contribute and the skills to accomplish whatever you set out to achieve, what kinds of words would you use when talking to others?
The choice to live the life that you want comes from inside of you. It is independent of whatever is occurring around you at any moment.
The belief in yourself needs to come from within.
You have every right to be here. You have every right to be happy, successful, content and secure. You have every right to live a full life, free of persecution and safe in every moment. If the outside world isn’t reflecting this back to you now, then at least make it true on the inside.
That is where your power lies. Regardless of the life situation, the life within can shine as brightly as you choose to allow.
Why would you choose anything less than the best?